News of Justin Bieber and Hailey Baldwin‘s engagement broke recently, and fans are now keeping a close eye on the couple’s every move. But one thing Bieber just wrote in an Instagram post is raising a few eyebrows.
The post in question was from his fiancée.
In it, the 21-year-old Baldwin wears glamorous hair and makeup, and she captioned the shot with two hearts. “Dats mine,” Bieber wrote in the comments.
Bieber doesn’t follow his fiancé on Instagram, but he acknowledged their engagement on the platform earlier this week. “Was gonna wait a while to say anything but word travels fast, listen plain and simple Hailey I am soooo in love with everything about you!” he captioned two black and white photos of the couple. “So committed to spending my life getting to know every single part of you loving you patiently and kindLY. I promise to lead our family with honor and integrity letting Jesus through his Holy Spirit guide us in everything we do and every decision we make. My heart is COMPLETELY and FULLY YOURS and I will ALWAYS put you first! You are the love of my life Hailey Baldwin and I wouldn’t want to spend it with anybody else. You make me so much better and we compliment each other so well!!”
While some fans thought his most recent comment was sweet, it’s actually “a problematic throwback,” licensed clinical psychologist Ramani Durvasula, author of Should I Stay or Should I Go?, tells Yahoo Lifestyle. “It only supports the immature ideology of young people that ‘putting a ring on it’ ices the possession of someone,” she says. Saying “Dats mine” is also an insecure move, Durvasula adds: “In a healthy relationship, one does not need to stake a claim.”
Some people joke about this with their significant others from time to time, but even that isn’t really a good idea. “Behind every joke is a bit of truth: We joke about the things we are uncomfortable about,” Durvasula says.
There are certain clues a partner might be possessive. Statements like “Dats mine” or “you belong to me” aren’t great, Durvasula says, and neither is someone introducing a partner as “my girl.” Being controlling in a relationship by restricting a partner’s movements, asking where they are, and insisting on driving a partner everywhere are other possessive signs to keep on the back burner, Durvasula says.
Ultimately, implying that a woman is property “reduces a person to an object,” Durvasula says. “If you are secure, you believe that someone wants to be with you for you and can let them go if they don’t,” she points out.
Read more from Yahoo Lifestyle:
- Justin Bieber and Hailey Baldwin are getting married — are quickie engagements contagious?
- Nev Schulman on sliding into his wife’s DMs: ‘Some women tend to like when you’re, like, direct’
- Kylie Jenner reveals 5-month-old Stormi’s pierced ears — just weeks after sister Khloé Kardashian was mommy-shamed