Demi Lovato comes out as non-binary, changes pronouns to they/them

·Editor, Yahoo Entertainment
·3-min read

Demi Lovato kicked off their new podcast, 4D with Demi Lovato, with a "very personal" announcement.

"Over the past year and a half, I've been doing some healing and self-reflective work," said the 28-year-old singer. "And through this work, I've had the revelation that I identify as non-binary. With that said, I'll officially be changing my pronouns to they/them. I feel that this best represents the fluidity I feel in my gender expression and allows me to feel most authentic and true to the person I both know I am, and still am discovering."

They said they're still "learning and coming into myself" and "don't claim to be an expert," so they invited first guest Alok Vaid-Menon, a gender non-conforming writer and performer, to join for the conversation. Lovato met Vaid-Menon after discussing being non-binary with singer Sam Smith.

During the conversation, Lovato defined non-binary with Vaid-Menon, saying it means "you are not exclusively a man nor a woman." GLAAD's website defines non-binary and/or genderqueer as "terms used by some people who experience their gender identity and/or gender expression as falling outside the categories of man and woman. They may define their gender as falling somewhere in between man and woman, or they may define it as wholly different from these terms. The term is not a synonym for transgender or transsexual and should only be used if someone self-identifies as non-binary and/or genderqueer."

Lovato and Vaid-Menon also discussed pronouns, and the "Dancing With the Devil" singer said "it would mean the world if people could start identifying me as they/them. However, she'll "be accepting" if people "slip" and use she/her pronouns. Lovato just requests that people are "making the effort."

They realize it may take getting used to, explaining, "I think it's important because I want to use these pronouns that feel right to me. I also just don't want people to be so afraid of messing up that they don't try to use them." 

Vaid-Menon said it takes "practice and commitment."

Lovato spoke about their 2018 drug overdose, which was looked at in their YouTube documentary Dancing With the Devil earlier this year, and how it forced them to be more truthful about everything in their life.

"I feel like the reason why that happened was because I was ignoring my truth, and I was suppressing who I really am in order to please stylists or team members or this or that, or even fans that wanted me to be the sexy, feminine pop star in the ... leotard and look a certain way, you know?" they said.

Lovato said they never want to end up where they were "a few years ago," so "every day of my life, I'm going to do whatever I can to live my truth to the fullest — and be as loud as I can with it so that other people feel comfortable living their truth as well."

In an Instagram post sharing that the podcast was live, Lovato also shared their personal announcement. 

The pop star noted, "Sharing this with you now opens another level of vulnerability for me. I’m doing this for those out there that haven’t been able to share who they truly are with their loved ones. Please keep living in your truths and know I am sending so much love your way."

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In March, Lovato opened up to fans about being pansexual, meaning they're attracted to all genders. They said they are proud to be part of the "alphabet mafia," referring to the LGBTQIA+ community.

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