Are you sitting down? No seriously! Ok, now brace yourselves for the biggest bit of news since Donald Trump's small hands.
Chuck Norris, yes Chuck Norris, the man who can finish an entire bottle of milk in five seconds...using a fork, is about to launch a mobile game.
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Now, before you rush out to download it from the Norris-sphere that controls the galactic internet, please be advised that it's only going to release in April.
The game, called Nonstop Chuck Norris, will allow gamers to play as Norris's sidekick. Of course, you can't actually play as Chuck, because as we all know, no one controls Chuck Norris.
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There's bound to be a lot of action, and maybe even a cameo from Superman, who once fought Chuck Norris...the loser had to wear his underwear outside his pants!
Published by German company Flaregames, the game will be challenging, and Chuck says, "It's a tough job to be my sidekick and I hope players are up to the challenge!"
In case you're an absolute heathen and don't know who Chuck Norris is, here are some FACTS!
- Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square.
- Chuck Norris once robbed a gun store with a knife.
- There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
- The First Law of Thermodynamics states that energy can neither be created nor destroyed... unless it meets Chuck Norris.
- Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.
- Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.
- Chuck Norris narrates Morgan Freeman's life.
- Chuck Norris can pick oranges from an apple tree and make the best lemonade youve ever tasted.
- There once was a street called Chuck Norris, but the name was changed for public safety because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.