Virtual reality

Tue, Jul 15 12:25 AM

If your marriage was made online, there's a one in three chance that you will be sitting in front of a marriage counsellor, say experts. Psychiatrists in the capital have recorded an increase in the number of married couples, who met in cyber space, seeking counselling.

Psychiatrist Rahul Chandhok has seen around 12 cases of urban professionals in the past month. "Those unhappy with their partners' looks say that by the time they met they were already emotionally involved.

Others are not compatible with in-laws." Online profiles and personalities often mask the person's real identity, which, say experts, is the main reason for the breakdown of marriages.

People add lot of colour to the way they present themselves, which sparks off the attraction. Factors we would consider in person don't come into the reckoning online.

According to psychiatrist Deepak Raheja, there's been a 30 per cent rise in the number of such couples seeking counselling. "Most people get into these relationships when they've been hurt and are looking for an anchor.

They are emotionally na and #239;ve and such relationships often lack emotional reasoning." Once the initial chemistry fizzles out they realise that there's no compatibility.

Experts say that people who interact over the net normally have a very independent way of thinking and cannot, at times, shoulder the responsibilities that come with marriage. Psychiatrists say that physical proximity is very important in a relationship.

If it starts online, couples miss non-verbal cues and marry with faulty perceptions. But the problems can be sorted, says Dr Samir Parikh.

"I give these couples the same counselling I would to any other couple facing marital problems.".

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